SINGAPORE — Blockchain startup OpenFreedomChain announced a $50 million raise to decentralize power in its industry from a consortium of five dominant investors.

The round was led by those same five investors.

“The future must belong to everyone,” said the founder while unveiling a governance structure that grants 78% voting power to the lead investors.

A token launch is expected shortly after decentralization becomes sufficiently centralized.

Here are Onion-style mini posts for The Daily Rug Blog — short, punchy, and written as if they’re reporting completely serious news.